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From Migraines To A voice In Her Head

At the time, her husband and three children were in the United States. Her husband was on a two-week business trip and the children were either studying or working. At the time, her husband and three children were in the United States. Her husband was on a two-week business trip and the children were either studying or working.

She told no one about her fears that it may be a brain tumour or how unbearable the pain was. She told no one about her fears that it may be a brain tumour or how unbearable the pain was.

Dr Goh's husband, Mr Vincent Loy, came home to find his wife rolling on the floor, shaking her head and muttering the word 'dog'. Dr Goh's husband, Mr Vincent Loy, came home to find his wife rolling on the floor, shaking her head and muttering the word 'dog'.

He dropped his bags and rushed to her. He dropped his bags and rushed to her.

Dazed, she dragged herself to the couch. Dazed, she dragged herself to the couch.

He called the police because he thought she had stopped breathing, and asked them to send an ambulance. He called the police because he thought she had stopped breathing, and asked them to send an ambulance.

Then, all of a sudden his wife stood up and said: 'Why do you panic, Vincent, I am perfectly okay. I am normal.' Then, all of a sudden his wife stood up and said: 'Why do you panic, Vincent, I am perfectly okay. I am normal.'

The police went away. The police went away.

One month later, she was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia. One month later, she was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia.

She started performing her 'dog' ritual of shaking her head up, down and sideways daily after the first incident, staring at the ceiling, fearing she was being spied upon, refusing to bathe, imagining the television was speaking to her, thinking the phone was bugged and then refusing to eat. She started performing her 'dog' ritual of shaking her head up, down and sideways daily after the first incident, staring at the ceiling, fearing she was being spied upon, refusing to bathe, imagining the television was speaking to her, thinking the phone was bugged and then refusing to eat.

'I think the migraines, in my case, were an early sign,' she says. 'I think the migraines, in my case, were an early sign,' she says.

A year from the day when her husband came home to find her on the floor, she started to write a book about her experience. Back From The Brink Of Insanity is a personal account of how she overcame her mental illness, which in her words was 'a thousand times harder than doing my PhD'. A year from the day when her husband came home to find her on the floor, she started to write a book about her experience. Back From The Brink Of Insanity is a personal account of how she overcame her mental illness, which in her words was 'a thousand times harder than doing my PhD'.

Dr Goh, who used to work in the sales department of an insurance company before studying for her BA in Communication and Media Management, her MBA and then her PhD in Business Administration, believed that someone was controlling her mind and body, namely 'The Controller' or 'TC' for short. This voice would tell her not to take her medication and not to trust her husband, family or friends. It was constant. Dr Goh, who used to work in the sales department of an insurance company before studying for her BA in Communication and Media Management, her MBA and then her PhD in Business Administration, believed that someone was controlling her mind and body, namely 'The Controller' or 'TC' for short. This voice would tell her not to take her medication and not to trust her husband, family or friends. It was constant.

Although she was prescribed medication, she did not take it as she should have. Predictably, without the medication, TC would be back. Although she was prescribed medication, she did not take it as she should have. Predictably, without the medication, TC would be back.

Her husband, a devout Buddhist, thought she was possessed and took her to Thailand, to a village outside Bangkok. There they met a medium and a bomoh (witch doctor), who performed a ritual together. She says that this 'had a negative impact because it created more fears and I was already very fearful'. Her husband, a devout Buddhist, thought she was possessed and took her to Thailand, to a village outside Bangkok. There they met a medium and a bomoh (witch doctor), who performed a ritual together. She says that this 'had a negative impact because it created more fears and I was already very fearful'.

On her return to Singapore after three days, she started experiencing 'hot flushes and sleeping problems, incontinence and mood swings'. Now she had something else to deal with: menopause. And still she would not take her medication. On her return to Singapore after three days, she started experiencing 'hot flushes and sleeping problems, incontinence and mood swings'. Now she had something else to deal with: menopause. And still she would not take her medication.

'I was admitted to Woodbridge Hospital: my fourth hospitalisation within a space of four months,' she says in the book. She was only there a night before asking her husband to take her home, which he did. But her paranoia continued, at home where she believed she had been betrayed by everyone around her. 'I was admitted to Woodbridge Hospital: my fourth hospitalisation within a space of four months,' she says in the book. She was only there a night before asking her husband to take her home, which he did. But her paranoia continued, at home where she believed she had been betrayed by everyone around her.

Finally, help came in the form of a letter from her sister Lee Lee, a nurse in California, which arrived on Aug 9, 2004 with the advice that she must take her medication. Dr Goh does not know why, but she trusted her and took the advice. Finally, help came in the form of a letter from her sister Lee Lee, a nurse in California, which arrived on Aug 9, 2004 with the advice that she must take her medication. Dr Goh does not know why, but she trusted her and took the advice.

The medication worked. But while it got rid of the voices, it did not get rid of the dullness of mind, fears, panic attacks and lethargy. Anti-depressants were required for those. The medication worked. But while it got rid of the voices, it did not get rid of the dullness of mind, fears, panic attacks and lethargy. Anti-depressants were required for those.

Gradually, over the last year, Dr Goh's intellect returned. She began to write her book, and even to give talks to patients and their caregivers, professionals working in the mental health industry and counsellors. Organisations that have invited her to give talks include the Academy of Certified Counsellors, the Academy of Human Development, the Singapore Association for Mental Health and the Informatics Group. Gradually, over the last year, Dr Goh's intellect returned. She began to write her book, and even to give talks to patients and their caregivers, professionals working in the mental health industry and counsellors. Organisations that have invited her to give talks include the Academy of Certified Counsellors, the Academy of Human Development, the Singapore Association for Mental Health and the Informatics Group.

Her message is that schizophrenia is a 'highly treatable illness and medication is a must to prevent relapse'. Counselling is vital and 'part of the overall package for successful recovery', she says. Her message is that schizophrenia is a 'highly treatable illness and medication is a must to prevent relapse'. Counselling is vital and 'part of the overall package for successful recovery', she says.

When Dr Goh started taking her medication, she also saw a counsellor. It helped her so much that she founded a counselling service, Aspiron Services, in June last year. When Dr Goh started taking her medication, she also saw a counsellor. It helped her so much that she founded a counselling service, Aspiron Services, in June last year.

All her professional counsellors have years of experience, work on a freelance basis and provide counselling for depression, mental illness, stress management, relationship issues and gambling addiction. All her professional counsellors have years of experience, work on a freelance basis and provide counselling for depression, mental illness, stress management, relationship issues and gambling addiction.

Dr Goh is aware of the family link in schizophrenia. Her aunt had it and 'there is a 10 per cent chance that my children could also be schizophrenic later in life, but there is no test for it'. Dr Goh is aware of the family link in schizophrenia. Her aunt had it and 'there is a 10 per cent chance that my children could also be schizophrenic later in life, but there is no test for it'.

The mother of Ian, 25, Olivia, 23, and Shaun, 20, says her experience has made her stronger. The children, she says, are all very happy that she had the determination to turn her life around and are proud of her for having the courage to tell her story. The mother of Ian, 25, Olivia, 23, and Shaun, 20, says her experience has made her stronger. The children, she says, are all very happy that she had the determination to turn her life around and are proud of her for having the courage to tell her story.

After reading the book, Shaun wrote to her and said: 'I'm not sure whether I'd have the courage to open a can of worms for the world to see. Your book is definitely inspiring and serves as a glimmer of hope for others in a similar predicament and for their families.' After reading the book, Shaun wrote to her and said: 'I'm not sure whether I'd have the courage to open a can of worms for the world to see. Your book is definitely inspiring and serves as a glimmer of hope for others in a similar predicament and for their families.'

About her illness, Dr Goh says: 'If you can overcome that, there are lots of challenges in life that you can overcome too.' About her illness, Dr Goh says: 'If you can overcome that, there are lots of challenges in life that you can overcome too.'

Aspiron Services is at 10 Anson Road, #30-07 International Plaza, tel: 6559-3703. The counsellors charge $100 per hour. Go to www.rankbooks.com to order Back From The Brink Of Insanity. It costs $15. Aspiron Services is at 10 Anson Road, #30-07 International Plaza, tel: 6559-3703. The counsellors charge $100 per hour. Go to www.rankbooks.com to order Back From The Brink Of Insanity. It costs $15.

By Elaine Young - 11 January 2006
The Straits Times

With permission from Singapore Press Holding http://health.asiaone.com.sg/fitness/20060111_001.html

Dr. Rita Goh is the founder of Aspiron Services, provider of a suite of counseling services. She has written two books, Back from the Brink of Insanity and Hack Attack. She has spoken widely on the topics related to mental illness and the human aspects of  IT security.

Dr. Goh holds a PhD in Business Administration and a MBA from Preston University (U.S.A.). She also has a Bachelor in Communication and Media Management from University of South Australia.

Dr. Goh's hobbies include singing and reading. Her favourite authors are Anthony Robbins and Chu Chin Ning.

Aspiron Services 10 Anson Road #30-07 International Plaza Singapore 079903 Tel : 6559 3703 Fax 6477 9922 Website : www.ritagoh.com